breast cancer, cancer, Health and Fitness, Mental Health

Cancer Picked the Wrong Crazy

Do I think I need to go through chemotherapy? To kill my cancer? Honestly? No. I believe we were able to remove enough during surgery for it not to be of concern (with the proper lifestyle), however, like many things I’ve gone through in my life, I feel it’s a journey I should take. There will be others after me that will need the guidance, support, comfort and expertise, so I’m doing it for them, and, in order to understand the process. Plus, truth be told, I’m not ready to take on the extreme change of lifestyle necessary to maintain a cancer-free existence. Not yet at least.

I’ve generally been one to resort to natural ways of healing. Got a headache? Try an apple, exercise, fresh air, water? Pill popping was never my thing. I tend to, instead, seek the source of whatever ailments I am experiencing. So, when it came to dealing with my cancer, poisoning my body felt off. Yet here we are, and since we’re here, might as well make the best of it!

January 31st, 2020 I had a port placed inside of me. From entering the hospital, to going under on the surgical table, things were chaotic, and as the days unfolded, I realized, traumatic. The next day, until just a few weeks ago, I started experiencing anxiety from the moment my eyes met the day. It was physically exhausting and zapped me of my mental stability.

I needed change. On February 22nd, the sun was out, not a cloud in the sky…I was like:

“I NEED some fresh air!” So I got it, and then some!

A beach with rocks, foot prints along the sand and the ocean and trees

The days following were beautiful, and so blessedly warm, for the season. I even got to see my parents and some of my best friends. (The humans, not the wolves, however…I DID wanna take one home!)

A collage of people, with wolves, face painting, motorcycles, friends and family.

Then, my body was like: “You need to get moving!” So I did…slowly but surely, I did.

Girl smiling on a treadmill with Fiji brand water

I made a pact to myself. They say it takes 66 days for a behavior to become automatic (become a habit) so? I decided to fight my way out of my rut, one day, 66 times, at a time.

Yes, I’m a mental case. I have THREE active notebooks. The “you got this” notebook, I received from a friend, that week. Talk about timing! It has become my fitness and wellness notebook. Thank you again Kristin.

Once that started, I started moving all over. I moved outside and inside. Moved uphill and down. I even started to move my brain cells again. My brain, was too much of a slush before, to absorb anything I was reading. That’s all gone now! After being summoned to play LEGO, I constructed a garage which I am quite proud of, and pieced together some nano sets I brought from Japan for the kids. (The pieces were too tiny for their little hands, nevertheless, they assisted by finding the pieces for me to put together. #TeamworkMakesTheDreamWork!) I decided, since Long Island’s gonna be the new home for me for a while, that I should explore it. So? I did, and found some REALLY sweet locations!

And now? Here we are…still on the go. Not only moving my body, but ALSO my brain cells at the SAME TIME! Life’s good.

Treadmill with a water bottle, book and a highlighter.

Since September 20th, when I received my cancer diagnosis, my life has been one doctor, test, and surgery, after another and I guess I just lost myself. I lost control of my life and its direction. Thankfully, the little soldier in me, scooped me up, before it was too late, and got me back into action!

This is my FULL day 3 after my first chemo session. Let’s hope this gangster can keep rising!

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